If Brands Were Pearl Tea Flavors

If you know anything about me, you know I am obsessed with pearl tea. No matter what your area calls it (boba, pearls, tapioca, bubble tea) you need to try it at least once, I have to admit that I usually drink pearl tea several times a week, almost as much as coffee!

My irrational love for these drinks inspired me to create a silly, fun post about what kinds of drinks major Lolita brands would be. Don't take this so seriously, I mean no disrespect to any brand or tea flavor. I hope you enjoy these, and comment below which one is your favorite!

• Alice and the Pirates is a rich black Assam tea from India with an interesting flair and complex taste. This milk tea is creamy and well put-together, with bitter coffee jelly for those lolitas and ouji who prefer a treat on the darker side of life.

• Angelic Pretty is a sweet honeydew milk tea, a standard flavor everyone has tried. Keeping with the traditional taste and structure, classic tapioca pearls await at the bottom of your cup of sugary goodness!

• Bodyline is a matcha milk tea. You either love it or hate it, and it is easy to make a very poor-tasting matcha. The choice of grass jelly is another hit-or-miss flavor representing the confusing nature of Mr. Yan birthday sales, 14 same-arm detachable sleeves, and an array of satin costumes and derpy models.

• Baby the Stars Shine Bright is another classic pearl tea flavor - strawberry milk tea. Strawberry is a safe flavor, with guaranteed sweetness in every sip. Traditional tapioca pearls compliment BTSSB's long-standing reign as a popular brand.

• Haenuli is an anything-but-traditional peach oolong. Everything from the tea type to the different topping is unique, just like Haenuli's designs. Peach is always a fresh choice for a creative slump or a hot summer day when all you have the energy to do is read Nunu comics.

• Innocent World is the epitome of classic tea flavor. Earl Grey milk tea is safe, comforting, and is always tasteful. Doesn't just saying Earl Grey make you feel more elegant and European?

• Juliette et Justine is a both crazy and elegant white grape tea. Even though this flavor is either loved or hated, you can't help but be intrigued by the idea of trying this unique flavor. The classic tapioca pearls add sweetness and assurance that you aren't bat-shit insane for liking such a different flavor. 

• Metamorphose is an almost grainy taro milk tea. Taro is such a strange flavor, you wonder how anyone thought of putting root vegetable in a drink... But somehow is tastes good anyways. The white pearls are unique additions to an already odd - but tasty? - tea.

• Moi Meme Moitie is a dark, bitter coffee milk tea. The low-fat milk adds only a touch of sweetness balanced by less syrup than usual. Just like the classic black tapioca pearls, MMM is an undisputed standard no matter what flavor of tea you prefer. If any magazi- ahem, tea place - tries to take coffee milk tea or classic pearls off the menu, its time to shake your fist and complain at the sacrilege to Mana-sama!

• Victorian Maiden is the ultimate elegance of rose jasmine tea. Less sweetener syrup is added to emphasize the delicate and feminine flavors that evokes a day dream of Sunday strolls through English gardens with a handsome beau and a good novel.